Strength.Courage.Hope: Keep Faith & Never Give up Hope

Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Keep Faith & Never Give up Hope

That is all I've lived by basically in the past year...well 3.5 years...Kayden was such an inspiration, I love being around him. He was a child of few words...He knew how to talk but he didn't talk a lot. He sure got his point across though lol. I kept my faith through everything he went through, from his pyloric stenosis surgery all the way until the last time I saw him. I never gave up hope even up until that last second before I walked into his room and saw my mom holding him. I couldn't bring myself to believe my big man was gone. I miss him so much every single day. Today September 14 makes it 2 months since my little boy went to Heaven to become an Angel. It seems like it's been forever since I've seen his sweet little face and heard his cute little voice, but at the same time I'm just like ugh it's only been 2 months....I hate thinking of how long I have without him, I miss him more and more each day. I don't care how many times you people say it, it does not get easier. It will NEVER get easier so STOP telling me that. What it is, is I learn to control the emotions and deal with the pain and the hurt I feel. Kayden was too different he was not a normal child and I will continue to say that until I die. He was so special and he changed my life as well as anyone who knew him. I learned patience with Kayden, I know now as well that it doesn't matter how old you are or how young you are, when God wants you home he will call you home. I lived with death daily for the past year. Worrying if I'd wake up and my child wouldn't be breathing. I would go to his room just to watch him breathe. I fell apart when I saw him in my moms arms that morning. I wanted to die myself just to be with him. But once I got myself under control I knew I had the other little ones to worry about as well..I'll be with Kayden when it's my time.I still to this day and as long as I live I will live by keeping Faith and never giving up hope. Once you lose your faith you lose everything.
Miss you big man I love you so much <3

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About Me

My name is Misty. I'm 26 years old from Roanoke, VA. I am a single mom to my little ones. I've got 5 kids. Alexis, Kayden, Tavion & Isaiah. Kayden is my little Angel, he went to live with the Angels July 14, 2011 waiting on a heart transplant, he was 3.5 years old. Alexis is my oldest she is almost 9, Tavion is 5, Isaiah is 4, and Elijah is 4 months. I enjoy reading, watching movies, blogging, quiet nights(when possible), and long drives listening to music. I started blogging to tell people about Kayden's journey with a broken heart, now it's about life with him as an Angel & how I deal and you'll also get to know my other little ones. You can also visit Kayden's page at www.kaydenjames.weebly.com or on facebook at www.facebook.com/KaydenJamesCHDAngel

My Family

Little Miss Lexi

Alexis is my first child & my only girl. She was born on February 9, 2006. I found out I was pregnant with Lexi 2 months after I had a miscarriage. I was quite surprised that I was pregnant but I was excited along with scared and nervous. She is the best big sister anyone could ask for. She helps with her brothers & she helps me if I need her to..She is a very smart little girl as well, right now she is in preschool. I can't believe my baby girl is almost in Kindergarten. It's true that time doesn't stop for nothing.

Superman

Kayden took his first breath on December 21, 2007 and took his last breath on July 14, 2011. Kayden was born with a bilateral cleft lip and palate, dilated cardiomyopathy & a displaced tricuspid valve with tricuspid regurgitation. He had 6 surgeries in his 3 1/2 years. He had 3 to complete his cleft lip/palate, pyloric stenosis at a month old, a preauricular cyst removed & open heart surgery on March 17, 2011. He always had a smile on his face no matter how many challenges were thrown his way. I miss my child more than anything in this world. I love Kayden more than words can ever say. I am broken and will never be repaired, he was my life & my heart is shattered since he lost his battle with his CHD. I'll never stop telling his story because people need to be aware of what is possible & I would like to think that Kayden's life will save another child.

Crazy Tavy

My middle boy, Tavion James. Tavion was born on May 13, 2009 at 37 weeks. He was my biggest yet shortest baby born lol! He is a handful right now he is at the age he wants to get into everything. Although he is small still he holds his ground and has an attitude. He is starting to get into the terrible twos which is never fun but we will survive. He's an amazing little boy and always keep us smiling. Tavion has no health problems that we've noticed and hopefully he continues to stay that way.

Superman's Baby

Isaiah James was welcomed into the world on December 16, 2010 at 3:02 a.m. He weighed 7 lbs 11 oz. & was 20 1/2 inches!! He had a head full of beautiful black hair (just like his sister did). Kayden absolutely loved him and called him his baby. He's so full of energy, loves his brothers and his sister.
My Rainbow

Elijah was born on August 22, 2014, he was 7 lbs 14.8 oz. He's an absolute blessing. Elijah is my rainbow baby, I was so unsure about having more kids after I lost Kayden, but now I see Kayden picked this little fella to send me. I couldn't imagine my life without him. His smile brightens up my darkest day.